TV

What’s On TV Tonight? – 10/31/2012

It’s Halloween night! Luckily, if you haven’t got any plans, there’s a veritable wealth of programming to suit your needs.

8:00 PM EST

NICK’S PICK: The X Factor (“Auditions #5″) – Yes, FOX has moved the first live show up a day, pretty much ensuring that if you don’t watch FOX constantly or come to sites like these, you’re in for a cruel surprise on Thursday when you discover that you’ve pretty much missed the top 16 take the stage for the first time. It’s easily my favorite singing competition on TV, and if nothing else, I still think this show has a better chance of finding a viable mainstream star than anyone who’s ever won The Voice. Unless Dez Duron wins The Voice, in which case, forget I ever said anything. (FOX)

Animal Practice (“Wingmen”) – At this point, it feels like NBC is just burning off the remaining episodes it’s committed to airing. To be fair to the network, this week doesn’t sound too promising, as George treats a cockatoo that can’t lay off the chocolate, while Dorothy plans a movie night in which only Yamamoto shows up. Riveting? (NBC)

Arrow (“An Innocent Man”) – While looking into a suspicious murder case, Oliver realizes that one of his targets framed an innocent man; Walter asks an employee to investigate a large withdrawal that Moira made without his knowledge. Should have gotten LifeLock, brah. (The CW)

Survivor: Philippines (“Not the Only Actor on the Island”) – In a development that surprises no one, the two tribes merge. As all hell presumably breaks loose, contestants try to solidify their positions while Lisa is confronted about her past. Whoever had “Lisa’s past gets outed before Jeff’s” in the betting pool, step forward to collect your prize. (CBS)

It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown! If you’re in the mood for a classic, you really can’t go wrong with the Peanuts gang. Sure, it can occasionally be cruel to see Linus disbelieved, and Charlie getting nothing but rocks, but it sure beats the Sadie Hawkins Day special, It’s Time to Compromise and Ask Out Lucy, Charlie Brown! (ABC)

8:30 PM EST

Guys With Kids (“The Bathroom Incident”) – Gary gets Emily’s help organizing his apartment; Freddie and Ernie lock themselves in the bathroom; the guys talk to Nick about his lack of preparation. As a fellow Nick, I can totally identify. (NBC)

The Neighbors (“Larry Bird and the Iron Throne”) – Any show with a Game of Thrones reference in its episode title (Bunheads, I’m looking at you!) is aces, in my book. This week, Jackie tries to help Debbie plan Abby’s birthday; Larry shadows Lenny at work; Reggie tries to find a gift for Amber. Doesn’t sound terribly compelling, but then sitcom synopses never do: and hey, ABC must see something in the show, since they’ve just ordered a full season it.

9:00 PM EST

Law & Order: SVU (“Friending Emily”) – Rollins reconnects with her sister, while the investigation into a girl’s disappearance leads to a high-tech kidnapper who uses the Internet to cover his tracks. Not terribly unlike how husbands delete their own pornographic search history. (NBC)

Criminal Minds (“The Good Earth”) – When four men from Oregon go missing, the team looks for a common link; J.J. is upset when her son doesn’t want to celebrate Halloween. I guess the episode must be good if it’s titled after one of the greatest novels ever written, even if the connection isn’t readily apparent. Right? (CBS)

Modern Family (“Yard Sale”) – Jay and Gloria host a yard sale to help with a school fundraiser; Mitch and Cam vet Alex’s new friend; Manny finds a trunk full of secrets. Sounds vaguely like the plot to An Indian in the Cupboard. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. (ABC)

Supernatural (“Blood Brother”) – After Benny is brutally attacked by vampires, he calls Dean for help; Sam reflects on the life with Amelia he left behind. Sounds like a case for Kirk Cameron. (The CW)

9:30 PM EST

Suburgatory (“Ryan’s Song”) – Feeling guilty about keeping the truth from Ryan, Lisa agrees to help him with Tessa; Dallas invites her life coach along on her first date with George; Tessa baby-sits with Opus. A character named Opus? That’s seriously tremendous. Seriously, no sarcasm. (ABC)

10:00 PM EST

Nashville (“We Live In Two Different Worlds”) – The arrival of a woman from Teddy’s past tests his marriage; Rayna and Deacon perform at Teddy’s fundraiser; Gunnar connects with his publisher’s assistant; Juliette appears on “Good Morning America”, because sometimes you just have to set the record straight about why you shoplifted a bottle of nail polish in front of a group of camera-phoning teenage girls for no discernible reason. (ABC)

CSI: Crime Scene Investigation (“Play Dead”) – A K-9 is blamed for his partner’s death, but the team uncovers more details about the case; a high-profile divorce attorney with a lot of enemies is murdered. An attorney with a host of enemies? Surely, this is some kind of joke. (CBS)

Chicago Fire (“One Minute”) – Chief Boden faces accusations that he abandoned a homeless man to die in a warehouse fire; Severide helps an elderly woman; Detective Voight tries to convince Casey not to testify against his son; Shay has to face her ex during a call. It’s bad enough encountering an ex at Applebee’s, much less bumping into them while on call. Gross. (NBC)

South Park (“A Scause for Applause”) – A scandal has shaken everyone’s beliefs, causing them to begin cutting off their yellow support wristbands. Hey now, a doping scandal is no reason to go damaging a perfectly good ‘Live Strong’ bracelet. Think of the novelty resale value! (Comedy Central)

10:30 PM EST

Key & Peele (“Season 2, Episode 6″) – Jordan and Keegan celebrate Halloween by fleeing racist zombies; the stars of “Human Centipede” have a frightening reunion; a struggling public wizard school. I always knew my town was hiding a poor man’s Hogwarts up in here. (Comedy Central)

LATE NIGHT

Conan has Chelsea Handler (programming against her own show?), actor Nat Faxon, and music by NEEDTOBREATHE. (TBS, 11:00 PM EST)

Over on Chelsea Lately, John C. Reilly is promoting the film “Wreck-It Ralph”; other guests include: Brody Stevens; Loni Love; Gary Valentine. (11:00 PM EST, E!)

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart features Author Jon Ronson. (11:00 PM EST, Comedy Central)

The Colbert Report has Al Simpson (11:30 PM EST, Comedy Central)

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno has Actor John C. Reilly; reality-TV personality Jenni “JWoww” Farley; Lifehouse performs. (11:35 PM EST, NBC)

The Late Show with David Letterman welcomes Actress Kate Hudson; filmmaker Ken Burns; St. Vincent and David Byrne perform. (11:35 PM EST, CBS)

Jimmy Kimmel Live! has Radio personality Howard Stern; actor Tracy Morgan; music by Sharon Jones & the Dap-Kings. (12:00 AM, ABC)

The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson welcomes Jay Leno, because why not? It’s Halloween. (12:35 AM EST, CBS)

Late Night with Jimmy Fallon features TV host Andy Cohen; Trey Anastasio performs. (12:35 AM EST, NBC)

Credit: FOX

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