
Elyse Sewell, America’s Next Top Model Season One runner-up Top 3, blogged about her violent fight with ex-boyfriend Martin Crandell of the Shins on her LiveJournal. Wow. Elyse was my favorite that season. Here’s the cached copy from Google:
Think you had a shitty weekend? Nah. Why not compare it to mine?
1.) On the drive home (home?) from Albuquerque to Portland, my ex-boyfriend got shitfaced and roughed me up in a Sacramento hotel. I escaped from the room through a blitzkrieg of violence and talked to hotel security, who called the fuzz.
2.) Because he had a bite mark, inflicted in self-defense, on his arm, Marty told the police to PRESS CHARGES OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AGAINST ME. Now I am a felon.
3.) I spent the night in jail. Dig the hilarous monetary contents of my wallet as described by the pig who booked me:
4.) Jailors. America’s Next Top Model fans, all. As the warden took pics of my bloody knuckles for evidence (!!!! evidence!), he quipped, “So there goes that hand modeling job, huh? What’s Tyra going to say about this?” And here is how I was summoned from the holding cell for a strip-search, complete with a thorough plumbing of the boodissy: “Hey, Supermodel! Git over here!”
4.) A bail bondsman (!!! I have a bail bondsman!) got me out of the hoosegow this morning and took me to a hotel room where I now await my court date. Martin Lesley Crandall is still incarcerated. You can follow his saga by searching for his name on sacsheriff.com (inmate information).
So I’m stuck in Sac-town, alone and lonely, for 4-5 days until court. Court! OMFG.
On the flip side, I’m single and um, ready to mingle. Blind date, anyone?
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